Cosplay Cruise

By: ShifuSheep

Some people have a knack for finding strange things. Strange things always seem to find Zane Legends. While aboard the S.S. Artful Zane found quite a strange thing.

Boarding the ship already gave off strange vibes. The people around him were very strangely dressed. There were people with giant swords, bows and loaded quivers, and fancy wizard hats. Zane didn't know that this was a cosplay cruise and felt extremely underdressed.

The way they spoke was also strange. They all spoke dramatically, as though they were actors in a Shakespearean play.

When Zane arrived at his room he found the strange thing. At first, it didn't seem to strange. It was just a regular old authentic sword. Well, it was an odd thing to have on a cruise, but the odd thing was that the sword could speak.

"Oh, a normal person! You're not cursed, are you?" The blade said as Zane was setting down his bags. Zane whipped his head around, searching for the source of the voice.

"Over here, knucklehead!" The iron sword spoke with a thick New York accent.

Zane was dumbfounded. He stood with his jaw dropped. Did that sword just talk?

"Yes I talked kid, but get past that. Look, I needs you help. These nutheads brought me to life! How crazy is that? Well, I needs to get back to my owner, he's a wizard on the bottom floor. Left me here, you see? I need you to get me down to the bottom, without any of them knights seeing me."

Zane shook his head, trying to process what had just happened. A sword needs me to get him to the crew without him being seen? No way. Zane thought as he glanced at the sword again. It didn't have a mouth or eyes, but he thought he saw a reflection in the blade that was not his own. And it seemed to glow when it talked.

"I'm in the mood for an adventure." Zane said after a few seconds of pondering.
"Great kid. Put me in that scabbard so no one sees me. Let's hope no one recognizes the emblem on it. And be areful!"

Zane slid the sword into his scabbard and slung it onto his back. He lugged it out of his cabin and down the hall. Then he reached the stairs.

"What's wrong kid, just go to the bottom." Zane shook his head and swallowed. He backed away from the staircase

"Nuh uh" Zane said weakly. "I'm not going near that. I just can't."

"Alright kid whatever floats your boat. Turn around, I think there's a ramp over--" The sword was interrupted by heavy footsteps around the corner.

"Oi, nice job we got as jobs though eh? Betta than clean in' poop off the streets!" Said one gruff voice. More gruff voices laughed.

"Guards? They're bound to know the emblem on the scabbard! Jus jump the stairs kid, you'll be fine!"

"Sausages!" said Zane as the guards turned the corner. "I can't!"

"Ey boy," said one guard. "Whatcha doin out here all alone?"

"Looking for the bathroom." Said Zane hurriedly as the guard circled to his back "And what's this sword? Eh? I think I recognize this--"

Zane took off before he could finish his sentence.

He could still heard the guards yelling and running after him as he bolted down the hallway.

"Which way, sword?" Zane huffed.

"Down the ramps until there's no ramps left, then take a right and enter the first door on the left."

"Got it."

Zane slid to a stop at the end of the ramps, the guards not far behind. When he came to the door he slammed into it and realized too late that it was already slightly ajar. He fell to the floor in front of the shocked wizard in front of him.

"Your sword, take it!" Zane wheezed. The old wizard took the scabbard off Zane's back just as the guards burst through. "Put that sword down, wizard!" The front guard roared.

"Aha, you don 't just who your dealin with!" Said the sword as the wizard dashed forward with blinding speed.

The first guard clumsily blocked to first dash, but was slow to stop the second. Dead. The other four with him took now longer. They were all down within two minutes.

"Who..." Zane muttered, befuddled.

"I'll explain it all later, we must hurry to the captain's room!" Said the old wizard.

The old wizard slashed through the knights and guard in the way. Though he looked weak, the sword seemed to empower him.

When Zane and the wizard reached the captain's quarters, the captain was sitting in a large chair. "Well well well Lineven, I did not expect you do be here." He chuckled. "I suppose I should have known. You've been trying to take down my operation for awhile now. Do what you must." The wizard, Lineven, nodded and stepped forward. He plunged the sword into the captain's chest, then pulled it out.

Lineven later informed Zane that the cruise ship was a cover for Artful Assassins, an army of slaves cursed to be under the rule of whomever cast the dangerous spell. The captain, Rorian, was in charge of running the ship. Lineven and Joey, the sword, were tasked with killing the captain and freeing the slaves on the boat. The guards were casualties in the ongoing war between the Artful Assassins and the Kingdom.

Wow, Zane thought after getting off the boat, These guys are really dedicated to their roleplay.

Genre: Fantasy
Setting: On a ship
Character: Inanimate object